Boundaries occur everywhere and they are good. Think of a horse or a toddler without a fence. Think of a dog without rules. Think of your bank account without a PIN. We love these boundaries and use them to the fullest.
We agree with boundaries for others, but for some reason, we cannot reconcile ourselves with boundaries for self. Think of the red light runners. Think of all the overdrawn bank accounts. Think of overweight. We refuse to see the good in boundaries and quickly shrug them when they are imposed upon self.
People who ruin lives overeating, overspending, and running red lights probably would tell you the boundaries are good, but . . . deep down we hope some other rule cancels the ones we don’t like. A friend once actually told me eating cheese with apple pie will cancel the calories in the pie. Another friend told me she divorced her husband because, “divorce is too easy these days.” That’s a reason?
Actually, marriage used to be a boundary for most people. It kept the rightful spouses in and pretenders and diseases out, a good thing. These days, we’re so used to tossing boundaries for perceived convenience, we fall in and out of love, marriage, and all other “affairs” at the blink of an eye.
Do not get me wrong. I do not think every obese, broke, divorced person who accidentally wrecked while running a red light is bad.
I just think with so many, it may be a trend. Just look at all the boundaries and rules we ignore, and their resulting ruinous counterparts:
3. Motherhood–day care
6. Cooking–eating out
7. Seatbelt and texting laws–funerals
This incomplete list shows how all-encompassing the problem is.
Let’s each work to shorten this list, to add a few more boundaries to our lives.